Stanfordgirl

From the past: Friday May 4th I am in Astana. Yesterday I had a long walk with Gulshat. I learned that she won the green card. It is a really big move and achievement for dear friend. I learned that she has dependents and is planning to take care of them – women with children. We are real feminists J In the evening I had tea with Azat and Saniya, I learned that there are a lot of crazy people in Kz still, and people can d whatever they want. Also, Russian influence is huge. The conversation made me feel slightly disturbed. I watched videos of my dad and Bryan. Wow. How much dysfunctionality is there. I sleep near my mom and it is wonderful. Now arrival. When I arrived I was and am still ecstatic about Astana and Kazakh land. I just left the house and walked to the old square. The sky, the…

I am in Astana. I spent 5 days of happiness. Wow. Very interesting.

I have some awesome business ideas! I have to make them true

Expanding gt brands to other things. what do they buy online? cups, pens, gifts, etc.

Before leaving, I would like to go and clean my apartment nicely, see Emily's friend's place, make myself beautiful, maybe buy one or two clothes, look nice, pack, buy cream for Saniya, download my stuff from computer to hard drive

Today after meeting Bobby I will pack.

Tomorrow morning I will clean my apartment very nicely and in the evening buy rest of the gifts for Saniya and myself. When cleaning call Madina and Gulshat and have fun

At work I need to make sure Andrea put the ticket as #1, touch base with Julie how to find the chip jar. Schedule time for handoff with Angel and Riley, call  Matt IGT

Relax

I am happy and calm

I am leaving to Kazakhstan in 4 days! I am excited and happy, I didn't get yet that it is happening. Oh my god, I am afraid in a way. I need to: - order thing for my mom -today stop by Bartels - order things for Gulshat - I will wait for Gulshat and then order - I am happy - for my little ones: Abzal - robot - bb8 and do it yourself, little drone Asanali - robot - fast racing jump guy and programmible 3rd one Adiyat - robot Alisha - little one Aspandiyar - Mansur Ilker Dad - dayquill and his credit card dyad Samrak S Saniyek nujno pogovorit buy rug and vacuum machine - stop by world market What am I going to do in Kz: 1. I will play with my little ones, take them out 2. Meet my girls Venera, Madina, Shon, Gulshat, Asemgul, maybe 3. Go to Eurasia and shop 4. Go to places I grew up Molodezh…

My uchimsya na oshibkah, chto tut skazat. V etom godu ya provela slishkom mnogo vremeni i sil dlya Azamata i potom papy. Papa konechno eto kruto. Aza ya dumala da eto neudobstva, no eto ego jizn i ya mogu sdelat ego jizn lucshe - namnogo luchshe - ya ne znau sdelala li ya ego jizn luchshe. Poka chto net. No sama ya potratila ochen mnogo deneg i sil na nego - 6 mesyacev. Ya bous, da ya volnuus - potomu chto kompaniu gde ya rabotau kupila drugaya kompania. Ya dumau hochu li ya rabotat v kompanii gde my ne decision makers. Eshe odna naivnaya kompaniya. Ya viju chto mne nujno budet sdelat mnogo resheniy. Ya byla prava nujno vsegda dvigatsa vpered i ne brat status quo. Eto vremya teper ponyat kto ya i chto ya budu delat. Allah lubit manya. U Allah est horoshyi plan dlya menya. ya teper ochen m…

What can I say - I learned yesterday that my company DDI has been bought out by another company. Entire company is in shock. I have low energy and am feeling very lost. I care more about my love life and the fact that B didn't respond.

I want to sleep a lot. I still feel that the energy has been sucked out of my life.

I need to gather my thoughts. I want to work for a company that really cares about it's employees.

In fact what I need to do is gather as much info from IGT as possible before the door closes.

I need to go to Kazakhstan. I need to interview.

Andrea:

- classes to take soon

- promotion

- meeting with Korean guy

It's Saturday. My dad is leaving tomorrow. Wow, it was a heck of a time. It was wonderful.

Today my dad, Bryan and myself went to North bend, the hometown of my favorite movie Twin Peaks. What can I say, they both behaved very good, despite of my fears. My dad was happy. He took pictures and smiled. For many years I wanted to see this content face on my dad, where he is happy inside. He was for sure happy.My dreams came true. Thank you God

Of course I couldn't get enough of Bryan. I touched his hand at the end, it meant a lot to me. Every minute spent together is precious for me. Every word of his, actually every thought and every vulnerability. My vulnerable man.

I am kind of want to say - I love you lets just be together till you go.

I didn't do any job yesterday. I sat and watched johny depp and kate moss and other affairs. Looking at Johny, I understand B now. Oh, I can't believe I can say his name without pain, oh thanks god, I am a little hopeful.

Depp is in midlife crisis, he is asking is this it. Is it now done. Ambitious people have life crisis. He is with me and he wants it or not, he is insecure. I am independent, and a free spirit, and confident. I have a strong character.

He thinks he is overshadowed, he wants it all. ants to be with her. B wants to be with me, but how insecure he is. He thinks who she is, that I am going crazy. She is a bitch. He doesn't have trust.

Diego, his biggest fear - he is not #1. Hahahah

Okay, work

What happened is - I invited B to breakfast with my dad. Wow. Ada, you can do it.

I am at work now, and can't start working. Nothing seems interesting or important. I just want to relax. Actually, in 1 minute a meeting strats. Then lunch, then I will work. Oh my god, so many things to do. I will just get a tea, very strong and dive into work nicely. From 1 till 4, I will accomplish it all

I am at work. It is morning. I am feeling happy and slightly excited. My dear Z came to visit me. He still loves me like crazy, and still wants me. He is a wonderful human being. He is a rare example of real decency, real loyalty, real angel's heart. Fist day we went to the pop culture museum, pike place market, and golden gardens. Second day we took a long trip to edge of the world - Pialto beach. wow The third day we went to mount Si, for a a little hike. Everyday i was full of love and care. He cares for me always. This is the story of my life. My life. My life went this way.I had a boyfriend , I managed to split up, I met him again. He loves me, it's not a secret. He told me some stuff like I said that he was an option. I felt very sorry for what I said. wow. It did reach his ears. No…