March 22

Another day -

I woke up and didn't go to fix my car. I felt that there is a warm body next to me on my left side. It was like a piece of meat, but it warming me and making me feel not alone, making me feel something is there for me. I know think that it was an angel.

Then when I woke up an hour later, I remembered his face. I was sitting on the bar chair in his house. He was standing next to the sink leaning towards me - he was telling me about himself, he was opening up. His face was calm and trusting and happy. All I want is to see him happy.

We had a bonding talk, where we both loved each other.

This is the time of the year when I was falling in love with him. I would leave my office and walk and think of him. I will wake up with him in mind and go to sleep with him in mind. It is still the same.

I cannot remember bad things about him. All I want to do is to hug and warm him up. Like an angel that was near me this morning. I want to see his face calm and trusting.

Before once I was walking the streets at night, I promised that I won't hurt him, whatever happens I will not hurt him. I abandoned this promise. When he hurt me I abandoned this promise. I figured he is not a good man.