February 19th - President's day
I had a very intense weekend with my dad and my sister. Friday my dad, B and my sister went to North Bend again. I think it was nice. On Saturday my the gang and Z went to snowboarding, where I met my k-team colleagues. I felt good by the warm welcome. Snowboarding was nice too. At the beginning I felt like I don't want to risk my life anymore. Then I realized children snowboard, and I can nicely learn too. I can very strong at it, if I choose to. Our car got stuck. We then were trapped in the snow. I cleaned the snow and tires with kitchen pans. My sister liked it. We then went and had dinner at one nice place at White swan.
The next day we went hiking - it was a magic hike - we went all the way till the end even though it was hard for me. - little si. It started snowing on the way back. It felt like majic, miracle. We made wishes - my wish was to find my soulmate by the end of this year. Everyone knows finding a soulmate is a blessing. I will have it all in this life. I have everything to succeed and I will have it all - I am on the right path.
Today - I took my gang to whale-watching tour - my sister and my dad loved t.
Now I am about to start my week. I need to catch up with non- work elated things - write Carlos, write Alicia , write Efesa- get my foot in Microsoft. Get there then think.
Comfortable life - nice life - balanced life. I want extraordinary life. When I want it - I feel God inside. I am a child of God. For me as for a creature and beloved child of God - for me impossible is nothing.
I need to talk to a spiritual leader. If we are children of the God - why some of them are miserable, even though nothing bad they did. It is a very old question - I need to find the answer.
Religion - technology- art - it's all me. Gabriela Hearst - Max - Steve Jobs - ucrainian friends. I am around people who don't share my view. What did Steve do?
Have more faith in yourself. In moments like this I would like to talk to Bryan. He cannot make me happy - but he is religion - technology and art - in his own form.
How do I reconcile all these things - how do I put them together. Maybe my dad is my customer - why my dad is alive - what he has to bring. Can you answer this question? How do I find the answers. If there is no path to answer - there is no revelation. If everyone is like me - there is no beauty. Different and intricate. Different, intricate, beautiful. My coach asked me - can you think of things that you are grateful about your dad. I think I am grateful about:
My dad singles me out as extraordinary person.
My dad has unorthodox view of this world.
He has imagination.
He is a thinker.
he taught me to love - I am capable of love because of God and him.
He taught me - unquestionable love.
My da is an elephant man - he is here for a purpose. It's hard to see the purpose.
Who is this man who will be with me? Who is this loving investor?
What is he here now for? To show me how to say NO - and stay with it. Say NO to your own father. To be able to relate to other people with parents problems.
Where is my world. - where my story will lead? Will I get the papares through work - will I get papers through marriage - will I belong to art world - will I become mather of technology - will I be more profound than Steve Jobs - will I be around women inventors - will I be with silicon valley influencers - will I go to ashram to look intro my inner world - will I strengthen my connection to God?
Oprah said - bring excellence to everything you do. For now I will concentrate on my tomorrow :)